The big fat Indian wedding-Part 1

Wedding planners might want to shoot me for this one but this is one topic I thought I will blog about because I see so many of these all around, some I have to attend for the fear of being left behind friendless and assumed to be a freak…

I have seen the euphoria, the preparations- cards, invites, pre and post wedding parties, guests and accommodating them,food details, clothing details,venue specifications, priest for master of ceremonies, events …it seems like utter confusion descending on a household and utter madness to spend billions and millions on a few days that will only happen between 2 essential people- bride and groom…But emotions, prestige,social status, business networks and the most important one of them all- society, society and more society…

I will tackle this in bits because there’s lots to write and all in one post might confuse my readers especially those not so familiar with Indian customs and traditions. I am not a feminist nor am I against marriage nor am I some crazy girl who does not like good entertainment…there’s much more to the festivities and that ugly side rips my heart apart and causes me a great deal of pain to witness it in this so-called civilised, sophisticated century/era…

Besides the colour and the food there are over-strained parents, relatives mostly belonging to the bride’s side who have hardly slept in tension and fear of displeasing the groom’s side and bringing a bad name to the entire family. The  whole drama might fall apart for the want of attention to detail and there might be pleading and begging for pardon by of course- the bride’s side…The parents might take loans, break their fixed deposits, liquidate assets, pawn jewellery, resort to interest-greedy money lenders like Shylock from Merchant of Venice but might still fall short of pleasing the so-called son-in-law and the rest of the clowns in the circus. Well it is a gathering of clowns who want to get applaud for their acts but there’s hardly any humour here and tragedy is the essence…The parents stand up trying to make sure that their daughter looks pretty,has enough jewellery, venue looks great, food tastes fantastic but the additional pressure of meeting their future son-in-laws demands which they hope will be satisfied and their daughter will be subject to good treatment in her future home..Hopes differ from reality and when the crowd leaves they are left almost penniless and financially broken trying to pay back their loans and make it through for another few years before they rest in peace….

The educated so called self sufficient man does not have the courage to stand up against the system and actually encourages people to contribute to his family’s bright future..after all he might have sisters and forced to be paid for them..so why act noble and saintly,better to take and then decide how much can be shared or given at a later stage…The fact is that it is so normal that people do not care about the financial pressure and make sure that the D- day is special even though the rest of their lives will be ugly scars and a reminder of the burden they still owe….

 

Leaving you to dwell on this, not all of us are greedy and overworked but the ones who are free of these burdens are far and few, remember there’s more to the bling and that even glamour has an ugly side that concealers can seldom hide!!!!

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